The beginning

Prior to school starting I had been telling Abby when school started she would start sleeping in her own bed, in her own room. I had done the CIO method with her when she was 9 mos. old. Unfortunately it was bad timing, for whatever reason I did it the week before we were going to California. Consequently, new surroundings, the child wouldn't sleep by herself, and the previous week of agony I had put myself through was futile. She went back to co-sleeping with me and Phillip, and has been since.

I had expected a struggle from her. This past Sunday, the day before her first day of school, she came and said "I have to sleep in my bed like a big girl don't I?" I told her yes. She then proceeded to break my heart. This is actually when my crying saga began, and it continued on into Monday morning and throughout the day Monday.

She said "I don't want to grow up, I'm not going to have my memories anymore." "I'm not going to remember when I was 4, or being your baby." Trying to fight the tears LOL I told her she would remember, I remember when I was a little girl. I told her she is going to make new memories to go with her existing ones. I told her she is going to learn new things, and meet new friends, and she's going to have so much fun doing it. Then she said "I don't want to grow to an adult and leave you!" I told her she didn't have to, she could stay with me forever! Then " I can't. Everyone has to grow up and leave their mommies, I will miss you all the time though." She asked me to rock her which I used to do every night until she was 3. So I did. She said " You have to take lots of pictures of me and you, so I never forget being your baby". I fucking LOST IT!!! She cried, I cried. It was a very sad night for both us. I realized this is the beginning of letting her go as my baby, and she realizes this is the beginning of me letting her go as my little baby. She told me she was scared to go to school, and of course I told her I was EXCITED she was going, because she is going to have so much fun! Her face lit up, and I left her to go to sleep.

Monday morning I barely had to nudge her to wake her, she was ready! She had picked out her clothes the night before, and knew how she wanted to wear her hair. She was ecstatic! She has slept in her bed since Sunday night. She's my big girl.

She's gotten green at school every day this week! I've decided to implement the same discipline plan at home. If she gets green at school and home she gets a treat on the weekend. The puppy is doing well, accidents here and there. She's turning out to be quite fiesty.

Soccer practice was yesterday. I haven't uploaded the pics yet. She is her mothers child. Her attention span is almost non existant. She was more concerned with entertaining than participating in the activities. She was dancing on the field, blowing me kisses, and kept saying "are we done with this station yet!?" or she would blurt out "I need a water break!" or she kept saying "Mommy cheer for me!" LMAO! She's rather animated. I could hear the other parents making comments to each other. Fuck em. I'm sorry your kid lacks some friggin personality. Sheesh. Anway, I put her in soccer because that's what she wanted, and it's for fun people....they're 5! Her first game is on the 12th. This should be quite entertaining to say the least. I will be getting video of these children running all over the field. HA!

I'm glad it's Friday. I desperately need this weekend to recoup. I've been sick since Monday. I'm exhausted!

Toodles.